I know it has been a while, and I have a reason (or, perhaps, an excuse).  I am sure you have all heard the saying—if you do not have anything good to share, then do not share.  Well, I have not always had good news to share, and I hate to disappoint everyone who is cheering for me and wishing me the best.  So, I decided not to share.  After several months of people encouraging me to do otherwise, though, I am back to continue chronicling my journey with cancer and a new “C” in my life.

I can start with good news about my lymphoma.  My tests are all clear thus far, and my oncologist is happy with monitoring my blood work until any symptoms appear again.  He advised against any CT scans to monitor for enlarged lymph nodes, for a couple of reasons.  First, he said there is a chance we will see something, which will just cause alarm even if it is not harmful and does not need treatment.  Second, he wants to reduce my exposure to radiation so I do not become radioactive.  Too bad—maybe I would have developed super powers and could have joined the Avengers!

The other news is that in late December I found out I have a new “C” in my life—Crohn’s disease.  After dealing with cancer twice, I would never have suspected that another disease could make me feel worse.  Well, Crohn’s has done exactly that.  Some commercials for the medications make it seem like it just involves frequent trips to the bathroom.  But it is so much more and includes everything from fevers, infection, dehydration, malnutrition, to extreme fatigue, just to name a few.  Being the overachiever that I am, my body decided to go for the gold and exhibit as many symptoms as possible over the last 8 months.  To make matters more challenging, the most effective medications increase the risk of cancer . . . particularly lymphoma.  After dealing with the disease for 8 months, though, we ultimately decided that the risk is necessary.  I have started the treatment and am hoping to see improvement in the next 2-6 months (yes, it really takes that long!).

I used to say that I had good days and bad days, but life is more moment-to-moment than day-to-day right now.  I always want to give good news to the people who love and support me, including those reading this post.  So I am reluctant to share how things are really going.  But someone reminded me that everyone has struggles, and it often helps to hear about them and be reminded that we are not alone.  Whether the struggle is related to health, finances, work, relationships, or all of the above, we are not alone in struggling through this life.  Thinking we are alone only makes the struggles harder.  If we support each other, though, we can be reminded of the good moments that carry us through the darkest times.  Sometimes that means sharing the struggles, and sometimes that means sharing in joy.

Just this week, I had the most amazing moment with a coworker who has become a cherished friend.  I have been working from home (when I am able to work), and though I talk with her on the phone all of the time, I have not seen her for several months.  After a doctor’s appointment, I made a surprise visit—her hug and joy at seeing me was a real gift that I will treasure.  It is hard to put in words, but she embraced me and would not let go, crying at seeing me after so long.  That hug was a good, no, a great moment that will help me persevere through any bad moments to come.